Dear Unhealthy Parents,
Your daughter is gonna have sex. Your daughter is gonna suck a dick. She’s gonna lick a clit. She’s gonna touch herself. She’s gonna touch other people. She’s gonna have fetishes & kinks. She’s gonna be sexually attracted to people. People are gonna be sexually attracted to her. You have a human that you’re raising. She’s gonna fuck someone. That’s what humans do.
In no circumstance is it okay for you to punish her for having human feelings. When she has sex, she shouldn’t be afraid of what you would say about it. She shouldn’t have to do it in secret. She shouldn’t be afraid for you to find out. Especially if it means you’ll put your goddamn hands on her.
Don’t EVER try to destroy your daughter’s sexuality for ANY reason.
“I know what boys are after, I don’t want them to hurt her.” Guess what?? Your kid is going to get hurt by SOMEONE no matter what gender they are. That’s not an excuse anymore.
“What about STDs??” You’re her parent. Teach her about STDs. Have her ask her gynecologist. Sit with her & learn about safe sex & birth control. It’s not hard to find informational videos on YouTube too. There’s a way to prevent STDs without abstaining from sex.
“What if she gets pregnant?” Read the previous answer. If she gets pregnant anyway, help her to do what she wants to do with it. If she wants an abortion, take her to get one. If she wants to keep it, you STILL don’t get to punish her. Be disappointed, be stern, have a talk with her, but don’t ever make her feel like she’s a bad person for having had sex.
“I don’t want my daughter to be a thot/slut/whore.” It’s none of your business how many sexual partners your daughter has. It’s none of your business how many sexual partners ANYONE has. Sex should never be guilted or shamed.
“She won’t get any respect from men.” If you raised her to rely on respect from men, you raised her wrong. She should not live & breathe for the respect of men. She should live for the respect of herself, & part of that includes the freedom to have sex as much or as little as she pleases. She is not a device for men to judge & you should be ashamed of yourself if you’ve taught her that she is. Her worth should never be decided by a man.
Stop trying to make your daughter resent you. & don’t put your fucking hands on her for doing things that you don’t like. Beating children makes them afraid of you, & fear leads to resentment. What do you want them to remember when you died, the tender moments & fun times, or the times you beat the living fuck out of them for being human?? Be a parent, not a police officer.
No, I did not write this, and I would normally not be posting things like this, but it makes me think a lot. If I were a parent, of a teenager especially, I would have issue with a lot of things. Drugs. Smoking. Boozing. But sex is not one of them. Experimentation happens when you hit puberty. You try crossing every line and doing everything in rebellion possible. But as a parent, you should not be holding a chain connected to your kid. You are raising someone who will at some point be on their own. You will never be able to control their behavior. Influence it, perhaps, but never fully own it. This stigma and shame attached to sexuality should stop. Sexuality is a major part of being human. It is the expression of love and is full of the vitality of life. We are no longer in the stone age, or in the fifties. Make sure your kids are aware that they can tell you anything they feel they need to. They can confide in you…. If they cannot then that is unhealthy.
Just a few thoughts from the witchy.